The Truth About Change, Part 3
Truth #3
The Why and How of Change Eclipse When
We have been duped by the allure of change: “When I have this, don’t have that, stop being here and start being there, I will feel better.” When the new circumstance arrives – the change in relationship, job, season – we find discontent hitched a ride and has settled in again fully intact.
To avoid this disappointment, surrender attachment to believing that an external change will make the difference to how you feel. Instead, learn to use the discomfort of an external situation to investigate what is stuck, lacking or unsettled inside. If discontent with externals inspires inquiry of what blocks the inner peace, all circumstances are an invitation. Instead of focusing on “when” a change will come, we start cultivating the feeling we’re longing for by working with the inner reality we have now. Contentment shifts from being a state held hostage in the present to being a state we are responsible for creating and sustaining. In this alignment, the when will take care of itself.
Surrendering “when” gives opportunity to investigate other aspects of change, such as the why and how. Why make a change? Life can bring moments of such weariness we want to give up, walk away, escape. However, when we make a change out of being fed up, we sign up to take that frustrated person with us into the next circumstance. My litmus test for whether I have done my work is whether I can move toward the new with a full bow to what I am leaving. The caution flag is when I want to make a change with a “Take THIS, Buster!” energetic. Like throwing a resignation letter down on the boss’s desk, or firing the person making life difficult, such discordant action will not be of help. I want to move toward change because the vibrant energy inside me has clearly signaled what is next.
When the clarity of intent has settled, pay attention to how you make a change. Your focus as you shift will determine what you experience when you get through the transition.
As we learn in the flows of TriYoga, “to” is just as important as the posture or place we are headed toward. Mind superficially believes that when we can name the Asana – Mountain, Cat, Child (new job, new partner, new weather) – we’ve designated a moment more desirable than the one we are in. But Mountain to Cat is full of glory: watching how the spine moves, how the head surrenders, how the energy travels, how the breath flows, how the pacing unfolds. The way that we attend to our transitions determines what we will find when the next place or circumstance appears.
Life works this way. Conscious movement, mindfulness in each moment, self-inquiry will deliver us to an eternal river of experience that creates contentment, alignment, satisfaction and energy for life. In fact, Prana – that life energy which animates physical existence – can be translated from Sanskrit as “that which is always flowing.” Change is a given. The contentment you believed was out there waiting for you is longing for your embrace now. Aligned to the inner reality, change becomes the steady current of life that flows to eternity.
Author Theresa Shay is the Founding Director of TriYoga of Central Pennsylvania. She can be reached at theresa(at)PennsylvaniaYoga.com.